Marriage is no joke

By Fr. ROY CIMAGALA, roycimagala@gmail.com
January 30, 2021

For fun, people nowadays often make and trade jokes about marriage. Some of the recent ones that managed to tickle me are the following:

- I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. (Bill Clinton)

- There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage. (Michael Jordan)

- A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong. (Barack Obama)

- When you are in love, wonders happen. But once you get married, you wonder, what happened. (Steve Jobs)

We obviously should not take these jokes seriously, although many people say that they contain some grain of truth. Well, jokes will always have some grain of truth in them, otherwise they would not be funny. But that’s because whatever grain of truth they have is taken out of context or is not referred to the over-all nature and character of marriage. The grain of truth should therefore be taken with a grain of salt.

We need to see to it that we understand the real nature and purpose of marriage and the means of how to live it properly. For this, we need to go to its creator who is God and not us.

Many of the problems that arise in marriage nowadays precisely spring from the fact the many people nowadays do not anymore refer things to God to know their true nature, purpose and the proper means to use and live them.

People seem to prefer to refer marriage to their own ideas only, to their own consensus, which even in their best condition cannot cope with all the possible scenarios that marriage can occasion. They think that with their own ideas and their own powers alone or with the help of others only, they can make marriage work. With that mindset, it will just be a matter of time before they get disappointed and contradicted.

We need to understand that marriage is, first of all, a creation of God. It is not our own making, our own invention. As such, we need to go to God to understand it properly and to live it as it should be lived.

Marriage is meant for the proper development of humanity according to the designs that God has for mankind. It is meant for man and woman to generate love and to keep that love going not only for themselves, but also for God and for everybody else. In fact, it is meant to reflect the very love of God for mankind, for the Church.

It is meant for the establishment of a family, for the propagation of mankind, for the proper upbringing, education and formation of children, and for the good and welfare of the spouses and society in general.

More importantly, marriage has to be understood as a path of sanctification and apostolate for the persons involved. As such, it will always be involved in the drama of human salvation. There will be light and shadows, successes and defeats, gains and losses, good times and bad times, but in the end, if we do our part by uniting ourselves with Christ, we will also enjoy the victory of Christ. Christ always has the last word.